Friday, January 28, 2011

Of liars and exploding buses


I am a fan of  "Lie to me", a TV series about a fictional character whose expertise is in detecting the subtle body language of someone who is lying. If you've caught an episode or two, you can not help but cringe when you see the video footage of former AFP Chief of Staff Angelo Reyes making a motion to scratch his nose (to cover his mouth) as he responded to Sen. Jinggoy Estrada's question about the "pabaon" system in the AFP.

Fifty million and no one caught on. It is mind boggling, for most of us who live paycheck to paycheck anyway, how one can misappropriate that amount without being detected. But you see, the AFP has intelligence funds coming out of its nose, not subject to COA regulations. Fifty million is nothing. No one can know. And that is a loophole in the law that men, who wore stars on their shoulders, all know.

But siphon enough money from the intelligence funds for "pabaons", trips abroad with the missus, etc. and you've got military intelligence that can not even hope to detect the simplest of terrorist plots.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

That light at the end of the tunnel is a train


What's going on? Just when we thought we can all finally breathe a collective sigh of relief that at least one carnap gang has been neutralized, a bus explodes right in the heart of Makati, apparently the handiwork of terrorists. We were all caught mid-sigh, I guess.

When will it ever end? Unlike the movies, where we can cheat and see that only 15 minutes remain, there is nothing to indicate that the hero will eventually vanquish the bad guys in the final climax scene -- and that we will ever be in the clear.

Much as I want to, much as I hope that there was, we can not really send out the bat signal to anyone. We are all alone in this one. Memories of the PNP SWAT team storming that ill-fated bus are burnt deep into our brains.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

From Yahoo!



full story here
Now trending on Yahoo!: Todd Palin reqruented a massage therapist now busted for "prostitution"
I guess Sarah Palin's husband loves to have "sex" with "prostitutes" that he reqruented one particular massage therapist.

In other news, tabloid reporter was much too excited with a scoop to bother with correct spelling and syntax. Not even bothering with a period at the end of the sentence.

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Update: Since posting this, I've gotten a few hits courtesy of the keyword "reqruented". I suspect they read the very same article that was trending on the Yahoo main page.  Don't worry guys, your eyes are not deceiving you. The word does not exist.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Celebrity endorsement



If Kris Aquino can endorse feminine wash, why not Baron Geisler for Red Horse? Iyon ang tunay na LAKAS TAMA!

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Dumbest ever




You know Coke is in trouble when they are desperate enough to come up with this lame attempt to be "hip". It is probably the dumbest TV ad for at least the last 10 years. What were these guys thinking? I swear, this TV ad is giving me hyper-acidity. Someone hand me a bottle of C2 iced tea.


Friday, January 14, 2011

Password



Apparently Facebook now needs my email address and password so I can find friends on Facebook. Really?! Come on Facebook, this is an old cheap hacker trick!  

As for your assurance that "Facebook will not store your password", are we not supposed to give out our passwords in the first place?

Mark Zuckerberg, what are you up to?

Monday, January 10, 2011

Driver's license




Spent nearly a full day and 1,000 pesos to get my license renewed last Friday. Paid 75 pesos penalty for the late renewal (needed the 3 days to flush out the alcohol in my system) plus an additional 100 pesos for changing my address. Big brother now has my most recent picture, fingerprint, and 1 cup of my pee. Must be extra careful now as the government knows my home address, date of birth,  that I am single, my height, weight, and that I have 20/20 vision still.

But I wonder, now that I paid the high price for that intrusion into my private life, does this license earns me the right to run over this irritating family (TV ad above) if I find them doing model-like poses in the middle of the street?

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Self-esteem


I always check what is "now trending" on Yahoo. Number one at this very minute is an article on Raven Symone. I've never read so much BS crammed into one article.

She was quoted by People magazine, "Actually, now I wear bigger clothes because I don't like the way people stare at me." There must've been a terrible laundrymat accident then, the reason she wore an outfit to show off her new svelte look at the People's Choice awards.

I don't get it. Why go to all the trouble of losing the weight when you liked it better when you were fat (fat being the word used in the article, so don't blame me for it).

Memo to all women, it is called self-esteem for a reason. It is how you feel about yourself. The world has got nothing to do with your self-esteem. Losing weight so you can not like yourself simply does not make sense. And BS like this just confuses other women. So what Raven? More diet and exercise to prove that fat is sexy?

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Facebook security


FACEBOOK ALERT: As of today, NEW PRIVACY setting called "Instant Personalization" that shares data with non-Facebook websites and it is automatically set to "Enable." Go to Account >Privacy Settings > Applications and Websites >Instant Personalization > Edit Settings, and un-check "Enable". BTW if your friends don't do this, they will be sharing information about you. PLEASE COPY & REPOST
I got the above warning from a Facebook friend. I have yet to check nor change my Facebook settings. I see no need. I have always assumed that whatever I do/post on a SOCIAL NETWORKING SITE will be hacked and/or can be read by anyone. I have not and will not reveal anything embarrassing nor private. No silly drunken photos of me doing model-like poses. Yes, my FB account is boring.

Emails and PMs of course are a different matter.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Rap


Kung dati ako ay asar na asar sa mga kabataang nag-ra-rap shit, kumpleto pa ng jacket at bonnet, ngayon ko lang medyo nasakyan ang phenomenon na ito. Nanonood ako ng tv ng makita ko ang dalawang rappers na maglaban. Battle rap daw tawag nila dun. Teka muna, parang pamilyar ito a? Ah, oo nga pala. Ang unang Pinoy na master rapper ay hindi si Francis M. kundi si Francis B. Francisco Baltazaar/Balagtas. Subukan nyo, basahin ang katagang ito sa tempo ng rap, "O pag-ibig na makapangyarihan, nasok sa puso ninuman, lahat ay hahamakin masunod ka lamang." Yes, yes, yo!

Monday, January 3, 2011

Hope


Six months into the Aquino administration and 93% of the population is hopeful. This, even while the gains of the P-Noy presidency has yet to trickle down to the lowest rung of the economic ladder. Mang Pandoy is not richer today as he was a year ago. The only difference now, is the reason for hope.

We, as a nation, are hopeful that we've done the hard bit.  We now have a president who was actually elected into office. A president who eats hotdogs in lieu of million peso dinners. We now have an administration that bungles (at times) trying to do the right thing. No great shakes really, but definitely a welcome reprieve from the expertise by which the previous raped the nation.

But hope, strictly speaking, is not real. It is nothing more than a feeling that better things will come. Hope is a delicate flower that will wilt in the harsh glare of reality -- if that reality means no gains would ever come.

And we are not asking for the moon. We are realists. It is enough, for now, that this president didn't need the magic of Garci to get elected. It is enough, for now, that no new scandalous government contract is up for senate inquiry. It is enough, for now, that no manicuristas nor aerobics instructors are being assigned plush government positions. It is enough, for now, that this administration does not feel the need to flood the airwaves with TV ads on how good it is in serving the nation. Anyone else noticed that? The P-Noy administration has yet to release one TV ad congratulating themselves on how good they are. If only for that, I am hopeful.

But more than that, I am hoping that P-Noy's administration would deliver soon in tangible terms. That gains would trickle down to the lowest rung of the economic ladder. I, like the rest of  us all are, am waiting... and hoping.

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For the few of you who know me in real life, my dear kamag-anak inc., and friends from my Facebook account, please know that while I blog mostly about my life and my posts are made in the first person point of view, I do, from time to time, exercise literary license. Yes, I lie! Lol. No. Some of the stories depicted here are fiction. That I do not tell which is which, makes it a little more fun, doesn't it?

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Mungo Conspiracy would like to thank:

Kuya Bing for all the support without which I would not have been able to start this blog. My baby sister Charo, who has always been my number one fan. Gie for twisting Kuya Bing's arms to lend me support. Rocky for being the first follower. Chris for the free ad space on MTC.

I would also like to mention Kuya Jong and Kuya Rolly, Rex, Kim, and all of my pumpkins, Dustin, Innah, Jonas, Danwell, Glea, Jiro, Ram, Yzab, Hannah, and Annika, who are my inspirations for many of my stories here.

And thanks to the Iligan Chapter of the conspirators who were the first to fill-up my followers' box! :)

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email : mungoconspiracy@gmail.com