Recipe for love

Don't you dare believe the cliché that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Not true. Men are simple creatures. We've hardly evolved from our cave-dwelling ancestors, except that now we've decided that clubbing the woman of our choice on the head is no longer legal. 


The way to a man's heart is simple, show up. He asks you to go, you show up. Done deal. To show up in time is a bonus. To show up at all is enough.


Women, however, are not that simple. A woman needs to be wooed. Thus the appropriate name, get it? And I dare now turn the cliché on it's head and say that the way to a woman's heart is through her stomach.


Ever wonder why a pencil-neck chef like Rob Pengson is so "sexy"? Even I was befuddled. But my sister thinks so. And being the woman (and I am not), I have to take her word for it. Go ask your sister or a female friend if this is not true. Go ahead, I'll wait for you back here.


Yeah. Amazing right? Apparently a man who cooks for a woman is very sexy. Don't worry you fool. You don't need to be an expert. All you need to know is just enough so you can fake it.


And the good news is, Rob Pengson, probably tired of having to fend off all the women falling all over themselves for him, was kind enough to share a recipe or two on his cooking show. And while you fools were busy watching the pathetic games of the PBA, I was taking notes.


Here's one I am willing to share. Pay careful attention. I am only going to share one. 


Dinner for two.


Take 10 good-sized tiger prawns (about 3 inches in length) and remove the heads and de-shell. Save the heads. Remove veins and make tiny cuts so that it does not curl up when you fry it. Engineering majors, prove that your education was not all for naught! Season with salt and pepper (do not forget this bit). Slice up a nice sweet ripe mango that it approximates the length of the prawn and about a third of the girth (that's thickness, you fool). Lay them alongside each other in a lumpia wrapper. Add a leaf or two of cilantro (kinchay). Wrap neatly. Dab water on the lumpia wrapper to seal. Deep fry. Do not overcook. Once the lumpia wrapper turns brown, remove from the pan and remove excess oil by placing it on a paper napkin. Pretend you know what you are doing when you plate. Think Rob Pengson.


With the heads, you can make a nice sinigang broth. Do I need to explain how? You are that totally helpless? Okay. 


Heat cooking oil in pan. Add half a teaspoon of star margarine. Add garlic. Do not brown the garlic. Just sweat it. Once the garlic starts to smell, proceed to the next step which is to add one sliced up tomato. Add maybe a third of a spoon of patis (you can add some more later to suit your taste).  Add the prawn heads. Dash some black pepper and stir then add a one-and-a-half cups of water. Once the water starts to boil, add sinigang mix to taste. Add one green pepper (the long ones, not the bell pepper). Mix in sili leaves. Turn off heat then quickly add one roughly chopped onion (See the trick there? Not your traditional Pinoy way of cooking, huh.)


Serve with hot steaming rice.


For dessert, you can use the left-over mango. Mix water and sugar (about 50-50 to a cup) to make a simple syrup. Boil in hot pan and add roughly sliced-up mango. Wait until the mixture thickens. Then let it cool down. Serve in a nice wine goblet topped with a scoop of simple flavored ice-cream (not Rocky Road or Cookies and Cream).


There you have it.  An elegant dinner for two for less than one thousand pesos. You get an instant "A" for effort, plus an additional 50 pogi points if you executed the instructions with any kind of success at all.


Good luck.